But recently, through a wonderful stream of events, I'm learning how beautiful growing old really can be.
I've always looked up to my grandpa an incredible amount. He's just one of those people you can't get enough of and nearly everything he says has value. When I was in high school, I gave him a penny with the shape of a cross cut out of it for Christmas. I think I found it at Hallmark and trust me, it barely cost me more than a penny to buy. But on Christmas morning, with tears streaming down his face, you would have thought I'd bought him the world. He loved the penny that much.
And one year on his birthday, I was at a loss for ideas. What do you get for the man that is so content with his life, no material thing could ever make it better? So I gave him some cash, and asked him to do something nice for someone else with it. And a week later my grandpa told me the story of how he took a young man to lunch whom he hardly knew. And that young man will never forget my grandpa's generosity.
And this year, when his last daughter got married, he went to the gym every single week to make sure that he could walk her down the aisle without a cane. I wouldn't mind growing old if I could be like my grandpa.
I also look up to my aunt a lot. In my life, she's been the strongest single woman I've ever known to exist. When I was quite young, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. It didn't phase her. I never remember seeing her mad or upset. She always had a smile on her face. In fact, I remember her letting my sister and I play with her different wigs. While I'm quite sure it was one of the most frightening experiences she's ever been through, she never let us see one ounce of that fear.
But what's even more intriguing about my aunt is that this year, while she was 60 years old, she married the man of her dreams. This is her first marriage and most everyone agrees that this was the perfect time for her and her husband to begin their life together.
You see, if my aunt was only 55 when her and her husband connected, she might have lacked the beauty and life experience she gained during the past 5 years that her husband so deeply fell for.
Perhaps she wouldn't be the person she is today if she didn't endure those experiences and challenges. I'm quite sure God knew all along the two of them would be together. And he knew at what exact time in their lives they would fall madly in love.
My aunt has always been so content and happy with the life she has. She is a fighter and she is a lover. She is a giver but never a taker. I wouldn't mind growing old if I could be like my aunt.
And a blog about growing old wouldn't be complete if I didn't mention my father. When I think of the hardest decisions I've had to make, there isn't one that will ever come close to the decisions my dad has made.
When I was graduating high school, my dad's company had made the decision to relocate to Texas. All jobs, including his, would no longer be out of California. Our family was faced with one of the toughest decisions I think we've faced as a family. And my parents spent so much time agonizing over that decision. There was no shortage on tears, worries or prayer. After much prayer and consideration, my parents decided the family would relocate to Texas. And that evening, on deadline, my father called his boss and said he would accept the offer and transfer to Texas. And to our surprise, his boss said he could see how much trouble our family was having to make this decision. And, he offered us one more day to think about it. That extra day was the day that changed everything.
I don't know what is was about that day. But I know my father called his boss and told him the family would stay. We all knew what that meant. If the family would stay, my dad would no longer have a job. But that day, my dad made a decision to be a father, a husband and a leader over a businessman with a nice house and perhaps no worries about where the next paycheck would come. That day my dad chose family.
I'll never ever forget the decision my dad made that day. As Ryan and I grow older, I hope that one day we will have the courage to stick up for our family in the face of adversity. I hope we will chose family over any amount of money or the comfort of having a job. I wouldn't mind growing old if I could be like my father.
While I don't know much about growing old, there is one thing I know for certain. The older I get, the more I will become the person I was made to be. I'll end with the quote that inspired this blog:
"Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he
potentially is."
Erich Fromm
